Album: Songs for Sad Trolls Date: June 5, 2015 12:00:00 Date Added: April 13, 2024 URLs: - https://open.spotify.com/album/3OieT8H2spRakAR1rzq6SK - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/album/songs-for-sad-trolls - https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtJ3XTmKZunWovB49IjJEGm8lZVNJNxCq Artists: - PhemieC Cover Artists: - PhemieC Default Track Cover Artists: - PhemieC Art Tags: - Terezi Color: '#B3AFB0' Groups: - Fandom Commentary: |- PhemieC: Twelve songs about twelve kids with grey skin, orange horns and complicated destinies. PhemieC: (Bandcamp album art)

Jebb: (Wiki editor) All of the track art for this album has been taken from the SoundCloud uploads of the tracks. --- Track: Made Of Death Duration: '3:22' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/made-of-death - https://open.spotify.com/track/7hEfSiAaA1J5sMeliMQRzg - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/made-of-death - https://youtu.be/yMOJB52hCcs Art Tags: - Aradia - 'cw: corpse' Color: '#eb0000' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/made-of-death)) Homestuck Filk. A rough, sort of weird Aradia fansong I had to get out of my head. Made with my voice. A lot of my voice. Lyrics: |- (Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock...) I found a few spare milliseconds I'm prepared to waste I've been leaving copies of myself Across paradox space I've been a body with no soul And a soul in metal cold Please trust in what I tell you Don't you know that I am made of time? What a chorus line of corpses we've collected At least we're good at one thing, I suppose It's nice to feel excited once again Let's throw the loveliest of human funerals (Ahh...) I used to feel I stood for something Then I just felt fine I've fallen prey to feelings and Emotions that weren't mine I was never really gone at all But you believed I was So I'm sorry that I left But I've returned to help our cause In our story I do not narrate I just fill in the margins With bubbles, circles, shapes Where we may place our fallen friends Has it been years, or days Or has it been a breath? (breath, breath) I am made of time but I am also made of death Made of death Made of death Made of death Made of (tick, tock, tick, tock...) death Made of death Made of death Made of death Made of death Made of death Made of death Made of death --- Track: Finally I've Flown Duration: '3:47' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/finally-ive-flown - https://open.spotify.com/track/1boe41RLrvZuP3Dh0yroFQ - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/finally-ive-flown - https://youtu.be/iMNTfHPIYjE Art Tags: - Tavros Color: '#c36100' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/finally-ive-flown)) Some depressing, spoilery Tavros filk with a little bit of Gamzee/Tavros thrown in. Lyrics: |- Say that you believe in fairies ‘Cause if you don’t I’ll never fly again Falling down is not as scary As never finding confidence to stand And now I guess I’ll never know I’m in Neverland forever, I never will grow old And I’m leaving you lost boys and girls, alone And finally I’ve flown I’m a hero in a land of treasure And a failure in a body that’s all wrong I tried to measure up to this adventure To fantasize and make believe I’m strong But if I give my all and still amount to nothing in the end Then I guess it was pretend When I thought that I could help protect my friends And with my lance I’ll charge into the morning Look for me by the light of the second star Ahh... Ahh... I used to feel so small and wary But maybe growing up means many things So say that you believe in fairies 'Cause really, they’re just miracles with wings And if you miss me, let me go You can kiss me but my body will eventually grow cold But you can dream of me and I will let you know That I am fine here I am not alone And I can fly here Finally I’ve flown --- Track: Double Time Suffix Directory: true Always Reference By Directory: true Duration: '4:22' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/double-time - https://open.spotify.com/track/6TfWU2pQpyCs0XQU78ZPsf - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/double-time - https://youtu.be/0t-IB3wlREE Art Tags: - Sollux Color: '#a1a100' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/double-time)) A Sollux Captor fansong with Sollux<3Aradia Undertones and some rather silly voice acting. More lighthearted than a lot of my other stuff. Lyrics: |- (Heh, this is ridiculous) One of me is my enemy The other me is a pretty cool guy But I haven’t seen him around lately We don’t see eye to eye There’s too much noise and too much spit But I think I’ve got the hang of it Or at least I thought I did Until you up and kicked the bucket (Wait! I mean… Oh, fuck it) Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la, la, la-la-la-la Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la, la, la-la-la-la (Just get out of here, I'm trying to concentrate) What do you see in him? What could I say To convince you not to hop his way? I’ve never been too good at the ebb and sway Much prefer the electrical current Bees are buzzing in my mind That double-crossing and two-timing (Get it?) Prospectors pan shifting through sand Searching for a golden nugget Little brains build little bridges trying to connect But I’m already on the other side You’d know a lot about that, right? I’m twice the man as he is I’ll work for you double-time, would that be fine? (C'mon, seriously?) Of course it’s fine (Okay, cut it out. That's it, I'm serious, no whistling—) Primarily, I’m primary Though some may say I’m incomplete And should be in a jar Label me “DO NOT EAT” Hope has struck me in the face And with his ace of clubs he's shoved me Back into the race 'Cause second place still wins a trophy I might have overheated, now remind me how I died Was it my motherboard, or just my RAM? Now I’ve found a player two in you, I’m glad I fried I’m using every second that I can of double time Double time Double time Double trouble bursting bubbles (One of me is my enemy...) Where you go I’ll follow Hollow-eyed and now I’m fine (The other me is a pretty cool guy...) I’m only making up for lost time Tick and tock and red and blue (But I haven't seen him around lately...) The colours and the sounds I never knew When they were all I saw (We don't see eye to eye...) Now sightless-eyed and empty-jawed Double trouble bursting bubbles (There's too much noise and too much spit...) Where you go I’ll follow Hollow-eyed and now I’m fine (But I think I've got the hang of it...) I’m only making up for lost time Tick and tock and red and blue (Or at least I thought I did...) The colours and the sounds I never knew When they were all I saw (Until you up and kicked the bucket...) Now sightless-eyed and empty-jawed [Outro] Double time (Oh geez... What is it now? Okay—) Double time (Here, give it over here. You're just making it worse. Don't bug me anymore unless it's an emergency, okay?) --- Track: Friend, Leader. Duration: '4:46' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/friend-leader - https://open.spotify.com/track/4L1ATmMuhWTeDVkhYy6wRJ - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/friend-leader - https://youtu.be/7VqZ__xHZlo Art Tags: - Karkat Color: '#ff2400' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/friend-leader)) A Karkat Vantas Fansong, long awaited. It's basically about Karkat's perspective on Gamzee, Terezi and recent happenings in homestuck canon. Slightly spoiler. Lyrics: |- There will be no soft sounds this time, no arms, not mine at least Should've expected this, I guess, no "shh" can soothe your beast And it was my problem once, that violence inside your eyes Bright red and high with death and pie, and rage that never dies And I used to blame myself, then I blamed everybody else, but never you 'Cause you were just a messed up kid Who'd step in it, get scared and sit And pray for goats and gods who would know what to forbid And when you would reach out, well I'd run my big mean mouth and make it worse And maybe I deserve that hurt Destruction of my universe So if you've gotta beat somebody up don't make it her I'm sorry, I messed up, I'm not a leader anymore I'm sorry, I messed up, I'm not a leader Not a leader Not a leader, friend No more attempts to make you see, I tried, he succeeded, oh well But what I can say to a girl who'd play with a noose of excuses until Her big wicked grin disappears in the smoke, and crack goes the rope pulled true I know enough about doubt and hating myself to tell that you now know it too And I used to blame myself, then I blamed everybody else, including you But you were perfect as you were All angled out, a blinding blur So bright and beautiful, and clever, yeah for sure But when you would reach out, well I'd run my big mean mouth and make a mess And now it's my turn to confess I wasn't there, I didn't guess That you were slipping, 'til you tripped right off the edge I'm sorry I messed up, I'm not a leader anymore I'm sorry I messed up, I'm not a leader, not a leader, not a leader (I'm not a leader anymore, no more) Said a thousand words but they never helped I hid my scars from you out of shame Took up the cause, yeah I took the helm But I'm not the only one who's changed I knew you first, I knew you best I wish I'd stopped it way back then When things were bad, but they still made sense When we were kids, when we were friends Friend Leader Friend Leader Friend Leader Friend Leader --- Track: Furever Duration: '3:53' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/furever - https://open.spotify.com/track/2zlfFo6FPofaGBRM7hgxuW - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/furever - https://youtu.be/189zQRj_7HM Art Tags: - Nepeta - Equius - 'cw: blood' Color: '#588a00' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/furever)) Nepeta Filk. Equal parts Nepeta♦Equius and Nepeta♥Karkat (It's not actually as depressing as the track art makes it look). I sampled my cat meowing at the beginning :3 Lyrics: |- We all have got a role to play The lioness she stalks her prey He’s bleeding in the tall grass, unaware his thrashing makes him easier to follow But when she gets him in her claws She’ll invite him in because Her cave is not a home without him, just a hole that is lonely and hollow And can’t you see the writing on the wall is drawing us together? It’s written there in soot and ash and blood and that’s furever And so if you are terrified of what you hide, remember That I’m still on your side and that’s furever, furever We all have got a role to play You'll be filling yours someday And I'll be filling mine until then we’re killing time, hunting monsters in our minds And when I see you standing strong Pretending you don’t want to play along I’ll never make you blue (make you pay) Tackle you into a pile to unwind And can’t you see the writing on the wall is drawing us together? It’s written there in soot and ash (soot and ash) and blood and that’s furever And so if you have been denied, choke up your pride, remember That I am on your side, and that’s furever, furever, furever And I don’t have to argue, everybody knows you have issues, you lay your colors bare (in a manner of speaking) I’ll be there when you finally decide to bare your heart, it’s the part I want to share And I don’t have to argue, everybody knows you have issues, you wear them on your sleeves (so to speak) I’m not a thief, the only jewels that I need are your diamonds, and I find them following (find them following) The bows and arrows in your words The words behind your broken teeth The broken glass that’s under foot, and paw and hoof The high and low, whatever nonsense you believe The vast unknown laid out ahead The tears and anger, good and bad The big adventure still at hand, and paw and whiskers Grey, blue, red, whatever, I will understand And can't you see the writing on the wall is drawing us together? We’re written there in soot and ash and blood and that’s furever And so if I've been too discrete, let me repeat, remember That I’m still on your side, and that’s furever, furever, furever --- Track: Mary Suffix Directory: true Always Reference By Directory: true Duration: '4:04' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/mary - https://open.spotify.com/track/1hwxFQPyZgOdBF2TXw3L0Q - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/mary - https://youtu.be/27klCPedm48 Art Tags: - Kanaya Color: '#008f48' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/mary)) An echoic, atmospheric, mood-whiplashy Kanaya Fansong. Lyrics: |- Look at all the many colors, so exquisitely embroidered Delicately and precisely sewn into a line Organized in harmony, relationships so intricate How’d I ever come across a tapestry so fine? But what is this? You’re burning holes in my stitching The colours bleeding into one big mess Did you guess, I’d let this fabric fray? I’m meddling with murderers who still deserve to pay for their insanity And though I’m one of them, I’m rarest of my kind, for many fell but only I arose It’s been so long since I’ve seen the sun, who’s to say if the colours have faded? Locked away so long, now jaded, left only to decay I’m Mary I feel like Mary in this dress I’m Mary And virgin journeys lie before us, patient and inscrutable There’s clouds of visions, crowds of villains, mulling in withdrawal And who would make the sacrifice, who but I is suitable? Who but the sharp dressed woman with a dull chainsaw? I mean no insult, but I’m fed up It’s my fault, gave you the go ahead I’ve lost my way, my hopeful days Are just as dead as I am And failure on my part to intercede has now ironically Or cosmically, like poetry, come in between our destiny And us but now there’s nothing left and nobody to meddle with To try and make it better, it’s unsettling, to mother nothing Mightn’t I have seen this coming on the horizon? Storms of green and orange, this world of monsters taking form But no, it is my place to simply fade away like wind Like someone else that I could name that shouldn’t have been born Of Mary. I feel like Mary in this dress I’m Mary and I’ve nothing to confess But hear me, 'cause no-one else is left I’m Mary I’m Mary I’m Mary I’m Mary --- Track: A Confession Duration: '4:13' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/a-confession - https://open.spotify.com/track/2ClJzPCB969SeBjlllCix1 - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/a-confession - https://youtu.be/ThhdNY1rLuQ Art Tags: - Terezi Color: '#008b8b' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/a-confession)) Returning to my roots with some simple acoustic Scourge Sister filk from Terezi's POV. Lyrics: |- You cause nothing but trouble wherever you burn You’re the sunlight in my open eyes, but I won't go blind today 'Cause when liars lead minds with their wiles And clever distractions, I see through them And I’ve got experience dealing with repeat offenders They swing from my branches, like unripened fruit, found wanting when weighed With all of the evidence finally laid out in front of me, I can almost taste A confession, a confession So if the court would stay quiet for only a second I’m pleased to make my case, and tell my story But wait just a moment I’m passing a motion; I also am the judge, and the jury You should worry, you should worry Where are you leading us? All is malodorous evil The reddest of herrings is wearing a worrying scent You ask if I’m serious, why am I acting so gleeful? What do I want? Should you rather abscond or repent? Abscond or repent? Settle the score? No lawyer needs a spider in their corner shredding documents for sport Now, deciding your fate is no simple matter Because part of me knows that I would miss you But you’re so complicated, I couldn’t pin you down And now you’re becoming an issue Little thief on the run, I’m a witch hunt of one And the very first question I’ll ask in your interrogation Was all of it, everything, just one big game? And if so was it luck of the throw, your misrepresentation? And subsequent incrimination, incrimination While I was dreaming I learned a brand new way of seeing From a fetus, a mother, but also a beast and a ghost You ask if I’m kidding, you’re having a hard time believing Am I villain or victim? Why can’t I be neither, or both? Neither or both? It’s either/or It’s not multiple choice, you stupid girl Why don’t you break that magic eight ball, and give a coin a whirl Give a coin a whirl Give into the law Confess, you silly girl --- Track: An Apology Duration: '4:13' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/an-apology - https://open.spotify.com/track/244aZRNGpfb3SqfZIeXBbL - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/an-apology - https://youtu.be/7HN6RzzFw1o Art Tags: - Vriska Color: '#3796c6' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/an-apology)) A Vriska Fansong. Not much else to say. Lyrics: |- Once upon a time a stutter disgusted me Muttered distrust at me, pity you couldn't fly I've only ever taken what's mine So what if I help you, I'm helping myself, too? Twice I got the wind knocked out of me, why? Just to curl up and die? No, I've got too much pride So I breathe it in then let it out slow When I turn to go, find you trailing behind I fought for every last inch that I got Forgive me for leaving my spot Not standing in wait while you finished the race With those two broken legs you've got One thing's for sure... If I were you I never would have let it stop me I never have before And if you knew what I went through while trying to get through to you, you'd thank me! You'd get down on one knee, no matter how much it hurt And you would say "I'm sorry", but I would say it first... Once, the two of us were eye for an eye Now I've given up trying, how could I be so blind? You'll never let me settle the score To you I'm the scourge, not the the partner in crime I fought for every last one of you schmucks! I might as well have saved my luck Not wasted it all on some shortsighted, know-it-all So-called friends, you're not One thing's for sure... If I were you I never would have let it stop me I never have before And if you knew what I went through while trying to get through to you, you'd thank me! You'd find me in a dream, on some uncharted map And I would say I'm sorry, and you would want me back... Once the world was just a web and a spider, and so was I A liar in a dress of white --- Track: Inherit Nothing Duration: '4:50' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/inherit-nothing - https://open.spotify.com/track/6kEw6gNYDjZp0hIXtkMADh - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/inherit-nothing - https://youtu.be/B7bpv5xyrOY Art Tags: - Equius Color: '#487aef' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/inherit-nothing)) Some experimental, sort of jazzy, rather dark Equius Filk. I recommend headphones for this one. Lyrics: |- Little boy blue, don't you play too rough with your new toy If you touch her, she'll break and her blood is so annoying Don't you like to watch, much like a shadow lost in the shade? Make her, you'll unmake her, but you'd rather be unmade (Oh) It's not my place to interfere, my dear (Oh, no) Will you embrace me and erase my fear? (Woah) Wipe me out like a stain, with a grin I will hang from your string And by your judgment of my merit I'll inherit nothing Nothing is what I deserve Nothing is what I have earned If nothing is what you have chosen to give me Then nothing is for what I yearn Nothing lasts forever, nothing really matters Nothing never breaks, busts, bends, rusts, upends or shatters I've never had a weakness that couldn't be destroyed And I've never had a sinful thought that couldn't be avoided Control your temper, control your language, or anguish in languid soul It's what you were born to do, but you'd rather be controlled (Oh) I just presumed that you'd refuse me (Oh, no) Excuse this common fool his crudity (Woah) Break this wild horse, I will not fight, 'cause of course I would win (Of course I would win) And I'd much rather give in and bear it all 'till I inherit nothing Nothing is what I deserve Nothing is what I have earned If nothing is what you have chosen to give me Then nothing is for what I yearn Nothing lasts forever, nothing really matters Nothing never breaks, busts, bends, rusts, upends or shatters I must obey the order, for I've order to restore Each circuit sends a signal to the process in the core And if none of this means anything then what's my anger for? I'd rather be most anything, the dirt under your heel my king A peasant or a pauper, or a knight in shining armor What's required of your noble steed? Through your direction I am freed And neigh I say! I won't stand in the way of what you have decreed, for— Nothing is what I deserve Nothing is what I have earned If nothing is what you have chosen to give me Then nothing is for what I yearn Nothing lasts forever, nothing really matters Nothing never breaks and nothing never shatters --- Track: Little Clown Duration: '3:29' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/little-clown - https://open.spotify.com/track/5YtpEd4hSwPN4YUn2js2Hr - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/little-clown - https://youtu.be/5j9vIn59qqQ Art Tags: - Gamzee - Tavros - 'cw: corpse' - 'cw: blood' Color: '#a34bff' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/little-clown)) Atmospheric Sober!Gamzee Homestuck filk. :) Enjoy. Also spoilers I guess? Lyrics: |- What did you do, little clown? From his neck the walls are bleeding brown Soon the blue to follow, then the green Last will be the brightest red you’ve seen Brightest red you’ve ever seen I rotted little holes in all my flaws I and also I will be your gods Tear down the lies, little trolls Now I see the flaws I see the holes I see the flaws I see the holes Did you forget I was here? Everything you never thought to fear Did you mistake me for tame? Brother, things will never be the same Things will never be the same I am the bard, I sing of rage I sing of rage I sing I sang it to the heir, the rogue and page The rogue and page Page... Page… --- Track: Ugly Story Suffix Directory: true Originally Released As: track:ugly-story Duration: '3:19' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/ugly-story - https://open.spotify.com/track/4nbhJrsjUQ3QAOypDKnRQD - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/ugly-story - https://youtu.be/Nbxu8jl_jVU Art Tags: - Eridan Color: '#db00db' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/ugly-story)) Homestuck filk. An Eridan Ampora fansong I recorded with a sore throat and a headache, don't ask me why...but I kind of like the result. --- Track: Save You Duration: '5:08' URLs: - https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/save-you - https://open.spotify.com/track/5n8DWRAxkSXyprzrCbmmQ4 - https://phemiec.bandcamp.com/track/save-you - https://youtu.be/3YGM1euTS60 Art Tags: - Feferi - Sollux - 'cw: corpse' - 'cw: blood' Color: '#e30072' Commentary: |- PhemieC: ([SoundCloud commentary](https://soundcloud.com/hamsters/save-you)) Feferi Filk! My longest fansong yet! Very folky and mood-whiplash-y, so if it's too slow for you at first wait a bit. :) Lyrics: |- There was a darkness, that soothed me, and raised me up to dream In an abyss, those nightmares, they’re not what they seem They whispered of a world they’d known Where every child was their own All the colours of an oil spill when moonlight hits the wave, I’ll save you all You’ve seen all the things that I’ve seen, you’ve been all the places I’ve been, my friend You know all the things that I know, well maybe not all but most so who cares? Who is better or worse than anyone? I’ve made mistakes along the way, but who said things should stay the same? I don’t agree The universe is filled with so “moray” new exciting things to see, for you and me You don’t need saving, you can save yourself You’re all so special from the inside out Just take a second, look how far we’ve come I bet if the nightmares could see me now they’d say well done Well done, well done, well done daughter, daughter well done... There was a darkness, that knew me, and raised me wild and strong So hated, and so feared was she, though fearful most of all She whispered of a hunger deep And as old as the bones beneath her meat All strange serenades and never sleeps yet never wakes, I’ll break your fall You’ve done everything that you could, you feel like there’s something else you’re supposed to do Who crossed that road, who burned that bridge, who fought that current and swam with the fish, was it you? I’ve lost a friend, I’ve gained a friend, what’s a friend mean but a means to an end? I tried my best with Everyone I’ve ever loved I'll outlive unless I can find where life inside me rests, it is my test You don’t need saving, anymore, anymore But I’m still waving from a not-so-distant shore Just take a second, look at what you’ll start I’m sorry that I couldn’t save you, from darkness inside your heart Your heart, your heart, your hardened heart, friend…