Album: BOWMANIA
Date: March 10, 2017
Date Added: September 16, 2023
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/album/bowmania
- https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLMXVVm-BDvr-WH4GdzzNYqI5Q49-H5GAP
Cover Artists:
- Hadron
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Cover Art File Extension: png
Track Art File Extension: png
Banner Artists:
- Hadron
- Makin (edits for wiki)
Banner Dimensions: 1100x216
Banner File Extension: jpg
Wallpaper Artists:
- Makin
Wallpaper Style: 'opacity: 0.75;'
Color: '#efced8'
Groups:
- Cool and New Music Team
- Fandom
Commentary: |-
Cool and New Music Team:
a tribute to a [[group:michael-guy-bowman|bowman]], who, even he himself, was once a bowboy
Hadron:
([TRAILER - BOWMANIA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_I5TYEmuXM))
Michael Guy Bowman:
([Bowmania Reaction Livestream](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-gQDsSD8KI))
Ngame:
([Community listening stream w/ chat](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=52Ye4H8tADY))
---
Track: 'lore 2: the revengning'
Artists:
- ostrichlittledungeon
Contributors:
- Toast (scriptwriting)
- WHATISLOSTINTHEMINES (editing)
- Minish (editing)
- Bambosh (vocals)
- Scott Stutzman (vocals)
Cover Artists:
- William Leonard
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Duration: '02:18'
Referenced Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Savior of a Lot of Money
- Heir of Grief
Sampled Tracks:
- Your Bed
- Bumper to Bumper
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Bowman's Credit Score
- track:savior-of-a-lot-of-money
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/lore-2-the-revengning
- https://youtu.be/QKN9oelGbCc
Lyrics: |-
(It is March, 2017—nearly six months since Bowman was shot and killed. For six months, his—) (Brothaaaaaa) (Scott Stutzman quested valiantly, searching far and wide for any means to revive his—) (A-a-a-a-awesome!) (Companion. Then, deep in the heart of—) (Detroit! The pasta city!) (A mysterious cl”o”aked figure gifted Stutzman the knowledge necessary to bring back the dead. He makes his way now to the top of Mt.—) (Buttocks.) (To place Bowman's corpse on—) (Your bed.)
(I don't know how much longer I can carry on with this rotting corpse hanging over my shoulder, but I will do it or my name isn't Constable Governor Sam Houston. I will carry Bowman's body to his big Bowman bed in ten minutes, and then he will return to life, by gum! Whoopee! Whoopee!)
(He arrived at the fabled peak, the wind billowing against his rippling belly.)
(Hands on your head! Body on your bed! Bed safe... bed warm... bed knows... Wait a minute. What's happening? Is this really... Is this really... it is! Boo boo, here come da ghoooost!)
(Bo-bo-bo-Bowman!)
(Hilarious!)
(Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman...)
(Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman...)
(Awesome awesome)
(Bowma—)
---
Track: BOWMANIA ~ TITLE SCREEN
Artists:
- artist:kobacat
Cover Artists:
- BitesizeBird
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Stutzman
- Cool and New Music Team
Duration: '01:33'
Referenced Tracks:
- track:title-screen
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Every Time I Look Into Your Eyes
Sampled Tracks:
- track:title-screen
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Bowman's Head T-Shirt
- Bowman's Credit Score
- Backyard Fun
- Every Time I Look Into Your Eyes
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowmania-title-screen
- https://youtu.be/eP6PiLRWKeU
Lyrics: |-
(Hello Bowfans, and yes I said Bowfans, because Bowlievers is so 2012 and Bowmans why that's 2013 skidoo.)
(Uhh. silk-screened, with a photo of my head, you can buy it, now, soon, for this much.)
(I'm THINKING of a number between my buttocks.)
(Do you know what it is?)
(It happens to be 720.)
(I'm THINKING of a number between my buttocks.)
(This number happens to be between my buttocks which means I will save a lot of money.)
B O R E D BORED B (BORED) O
(What are we gonna do Michael?)
(I don't— the sky, I don't have any ideas)
(Wait a minute, Michael, let's have—)
---
Track: With Apologies to Neil Cicierega
Artists:
- Interrobang
Cover Artists:
- XenoZane
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '01:44'
Referenced Tracks:
- Pictures at an Exhibition - Promenade
Sampled Tracks:
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/with-apologies-to-neil-cicierega
- https://youtu.be/cGQrDyJUz6A
Lyrics: |-
I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm
Thinking, of a num, of a num, of a num, of a number
I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm
Thinking, of a number
I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm
Thinking, a number
I'm thinking, I'm thinking of a
I'm thinking thinking thinking of a number
I'm thinking I'm thinking of
I'm thinking I'm thinking of a number
Thinking of, thinking, thinking of, thinking
Of a num, ber, of a num ber,
Of a number, I'm, of a num ber
I'm thinking, thinking, thinking of a number
Thinking, thinking
Of a number
Thinking
I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm thinking of, thinking of,
I'm, I'm, I'm I'm...
---
Track: Bad Credit
Artists:
- Makin (lyrics, vocaloid)
- Tensei (mixing)
Cover Artists:
- Makin
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '03:38'
Referenced Tracks:
- Bad Apple!! feat. nomico
Sampled Tracks:
- Bad Apple!! feat. nomico
- Texas History
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bad-credit
- https://youtu.be/BjgM1WMm9gE
Lyrics: |-
(THE PLACE WAS GENSOKYO, THE YEAR WAS 19720)
I'm thinking of a number that is between my buttocks
And that number's not between 450 and 850
With nothing but greed capturing my heart
Will no one just go reach inside, cast away my bad score
Missing and unfound, undefined fantastic score
Can't reach this debtful soul, my subterranean fruity pebble
Seven hundred twenty desires denied by
The embodiment of the demonic Stutzbow
Reptile masquerade from the one debts left unpaid
An impossible ball catch, one hundred percent delayed
An immaterial coat missing on this freezing soul
The imperishable rice challenging my sinful hopes
I must keep escaping far from this perfect blosssomed yard
Its phantasmagoric view of penumbral small white hounds
Scarlet rhapsody police, running rotten to the core
I won't let them or the Stutzbow destroy my credit score
Bumper to bumper I flee, from the brothers that believe
That my sinful soul can solve the pasta's antinomy
Through idioms japanese, untranslatable I feel
The Stutzbow will never stop, chasing me with endless glee
Meme numbers won't appear, not a miracle, just fright
As I near my final fate, my endless numeric night
Texas history forlorn, in limbo its long lost lore
In this realm never forgiven, not my bad credit score
I'm thinking of a number that is between my buttocks
And that number's not between 450 and 850
With nothing but greed capturing my heart
Will no one just go reach inside, cast away my bad score
Missing and unfound, undefined fantastic score
Can't reach this debtful soul, my subterranean fruity pebble
Seven hundred twenty desires denied by
the embodiment of the demonic Stutzbow
Reptile masquerade from the one debts left unpaid
An impossible ball catch, one hundred percent delayed
An immaterial coat missing on this freezing soul
The imperishable rice challenging my sinful hopes
I must keep escaping far from this perfect blosssomed yard
Its phantasmagoric view of penumbral small white hounds
Scarlet rhapsody police, running rotten to the core
I won't let them or the Stutzbow destroy my credit score
Life insurance I can't pay, or a good bed to hide in
Is there no place to run to, a safe haven for my sins
Desperation swallows me, I feel wholly unprepared
From the Bowman I can't flee, from the Stutzman mercy's rare
Soon the brothers will catch up, meat cubes rising in the night
Their goal easy to discern, start an unwinnable fight
My bad credit and my life, forfeit to their endless war
A war started with a thought, thinking of a credit score
Commentary: |-
Makin: (Composer)
An explanation of the lyrics' references to Stutzbow and Touhou lore:
I'm thinking of a number that is between my buttocks <- bowman's credit score
And that number's not between 450 and 850
With nothing but greed capturing my heart
Will no one just go reach inside, cast away my bad score
Missing and unfound, undefined fantastic score <- undefined fantastic object
Can't reach this debtful soul, my subterranean fruity pebble <- fruity pebbles jingle, subterranean animism
Seven hundred twenty desires denied by <- ten desires
The embodiment of the demonic Stutzbow <- embodiment of scarlet devil
Reptile masquerade from the one debts left unpaid <- chameleon, hopeless masquerade
An impossible ball catch, one hundred percent delayed <- bowman can't catch, 100%, impossible spell card
An immaterial coat missing on this freezing soul <- william henry harrison, immaterial and missing power
The imperishable rice challenging my sinful hopes <- rice challenge, imperishable night
I must keep escaping far from this perfect blosssomed yard <- perfect cherry blossom, backyard fun
Its phantasmagoric view of penumbral small white hounds <- radiation is now on youtube, phantasmagoria of flower view
Scarlet rhapsody police, running rotten to the core <- scarlet weather rhapsody, good cop red cop
I won't let them or the Stutzbow destroy my credit score
Bumper to bumper I flee, from the brothers that believe <- bumper to bumper
That my sinful soul can solve the pasta's antinomy <- antinomy of common flowers
Through idioms japanese, untranslatable I feel <- an apple disaster
The Stutzbow will never stop, chasing me with endless glee <- gamebro
Meme numbers won't appear, not a miracle, just fright <- MEME NUMBERS
As I near my final fate, my endless numeric night
Texas history forlorn, in limbo its long lost lore <- texas history, urban legend in limbo
In this realm never forgiven, not my bad credit score
[...]
Life insurance I can't pay, or a good bed to hide in <- in bed
Is there no place to run to, a safe haven for my sins
Desperation swallows me, I feel wholly unprepared
From the Bowman I can't flee, from the Stutzman mercy's rare
Soon the brothers will catch up, meat cubes rising in the night <- bumper to bumper
Their goal easy to discern, start an unwinnable fight
My bad credit and my life, forfeit to their endless war
A war started with a thought, thinking of a credit score
---
Track: Bowreguard Stutzelogic Chaotixotica
Artists:
- Hadron
Cover Artists:
- Hadron
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '02:08'
Referenced Tracks:
- Sburban Jungle
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Fly
- Chorale for Jaspers
- Chain Of Prospit
Sampled Tracks:
- unknown TURN IT UP & other vague background samples
- Michael Bowman Remix
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowreguard-stutzelogic-chaotixotica
- https://youtu.be/ObAMTkBccos
Lyrics: |-
(Turn it up!)
(Turn it up!)
([unintelligible])
It's a Michael Bowman Remix!
Bo-bo-bo-bo Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bo-bo-bo-bo Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bo-bo-bo-bo Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bo-bo-bo-bo Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bo-bo-bo-bo Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bo-bo-bo-bo Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo—
---
Track: BowmaniASMR [Roleplay] [Intentional] [Part One]
Artists:
- Bin
- Gordian
- Kal-la-kal-la
Cover Artists:
- Bin
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '04:57'
Referenced Tracks:
- track:suicide-hotline
- Sburban Jungle
- track:MeGaLoVania
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowmaniasmr-roleplay-intentional-part-one
- https://youtu.be/WVwPTClag_A
Lyrics: |-
(This is not canon to Bowmania lore. It's not lore you dunkass.)
(Hello there, and welcome to the ASMR Factory. My name is Michael Guy Bowman, and I'll be your guide as you explore the exciting world of [[track:autonomonasty-senserational-meridisick-repose|Autonomonasty Senserational Meridisick Repose]]. Now I know what you're thinking: Mr. Bowman, can you tell us about the ASMR Factory? Why, of course, child. I've brought a few of my friends to help you experience Maximum Tingles, and we'll be taking you through a wide variety of different triggers. All in all we've got lots of fun prepared for you today, so just sit back, relax, and let the tingles help you drift away...)
(Hi, I'm Fred.)
(And I'm Marvin, Fred's brother.)
(And we're... Brotheeeeeeeeeeeeeeers.)
(You're listening to Bumper to Tingles, and we've got a great show for you today.)
(Fred, when you're right, you're right. I happen to be eating soup, but for you, I'll keep going.)
(And that's our show. Thanks for tuning in, everybody.)
(I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it.)
(Well, here we are again, Sullivan. You had the gall to come to me, in my ASMR Factory and expect to get off easy. Well, it's not gonna happen, Sullivan, I can tell you that much. But listen here, Sullivan. I can still cut you a deal. I could cut you a deal, if you were talking to me. But you're not talking to me, Sullivan. You're just sitting there, with a glazed look on your face, trapped in some sort of tingle-induced coma. And I don't like that, Sullivan. You want to know why I don't like that? Because I could be at home right now, Sullivan. I could be eating a little bag of Japanese candies that I ordered from Amazon. I could be running a rake through a miniature zen garden. I could be opening up a brand new packet of Floam, and letting the individual Floam pellets run through my fingers and squish together in a Floamy coalescence. I could be giving myself a haircut right now, Sullivan, filling up both of my ear canals with shaving cream. I could be doing that right now. I could be performing unlicensed cranial nerve exams on various household animals. I could be developing a new form of communication based on chewing cubes of raw meat at varying intensities. I could be going to see my mother with a book of pressed butterflies, Sullivan. Page after page of cold, dead insects, Sullivan. I could be reading through old dream diaries, crying over nightmares I had when I was just a boy, because I'm willing to do anything, including reliving the unending horror that was my childhood, to distract myself from my crippling addiction to ASMR. I've had it up to here with how much I ASMR, Sullivan! I need hobbies to distract myself from it. I've had it up to here with you, and that glazed look on your face, and our mutual addiction to ASMR, Sullivan. So you know what? I could make a deal with ya', Sullivan. I could work something out. You, me, and my 3Dio microphone, Sullivan. We could work out a deal with the tingles. You, me, a makeshift greenscreen, Sony Vegas Pro Movie Studio 14, and a crisp unopened bag of ionized crystals, all of these things and more, Sullivan. That doesn't seem to have swayed you, huh? Well, you've left me no choice, Sullivan. I guess you're gonna have to deal with my partner. Remember him, Sullivan?)
(RED STUFF.)
(The ASMR will return after these short messages.)
---
Track: Windows CS Installation Score
Artists:
- VulkanShawl
Cover Artists:
- cookiefonster
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '01:40'
Referenced Tracks:
- Hardchorale
- Windows XP Installation Music
Sampled Tracks:
- Hardchorale
- Windows XP Installation Music
- Bowman's Credit Score
- Windows FX
- Michael Bowman Remix
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/windows-cs-installation-score
- https://youtu.be/-rLb52q5fC0
Lyrics: |-
(I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks. Do you know what it is? It's my credit score, and it happens to be seven hundred and twenty. The higher my credit score, the better chance I have of saving a lot of money. I'm thinking of a number; between four hundred and fifty and eight fifty. Do you know what it is? It happens to be seven hundred and twenty, which is my free credit score. This number is between my buttocks. This number, I am thinking, is between four hundred and fifty and eight fifty. The higher this number it is, the better chance I have at saving a lot of money. But the number is between my buttocks! Do you know what number it is? It happens to be between four fifty and eight fifty, and the number is between my buttocks. The number is seven hundred and twenty. But do you know what number I'm thinking of? I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks. It happens to be between four fifty and eight fifty, and it could save me a lot of money the higher it is. Fortunately that number is seven hundred and twenty, which is a number between four fifty and eight fifty. This number between four fifty and eight fifty happens to be between my buttocks. The higher the number is between my buttocks, the better chance I have at saving a lot of money. This number happens to be between my buttocks, which means I will save a lot of money. But do you know what number I'm thinking of? The number I'm thinking of is seven hundred and twenty, and it happens to be between my buttocks.)
It's a Michael Bowman Remix!
---
Track: BowmaniASMR [Roleplay] [Intentional] [Part Two]
Artists:
- Bin
- Gordian
- Kal-la-kal-la
- Golden_Skylord
Cover Artists:
- Bin
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '05:32'
Referenced Tracks:
- Chorale for Jaspers
- Texas History Theme
- Haltmann Works Co. Theme Song
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowmaniasmr-roleplay-intentional-part-two
- https://youtu.be/T-XNpkMlO_Y
Lyrics: |-
(The talents of Pablo Picasso in his prime... Oh, I didn't see you there. It's me, Toby “Radiation” Fox, and I want to talk to you about the coolest and newest fandom on the internet. What, you come in here to get some tingles? People on Bandcamp will listen to anything! OHH! OHH! OHH! OHH! What fandom is it you may ask? Well, it's only for the best game ever made. You see, narratively, this game is a paragon of interactive storytelling. Every choice you make weighs on your conscience because every connection you make with the characters feels organic. Even the Pope agrees with me. In fact, he gave my game a 36 out of 5. Why, percentage wise, that'd be...)
(720% 720% 720% 720%...)
(How cool. How new. BUY IT.)
(The second age of steam, the second age of steam, the second age of steam, the second age of steam, the second age of steam...)
(Hello and welcome to your Texas History Virtual Textbook Laserdisk. The subject of this lesson is DENTAL RECORDS. As you can see here, I've got two full sets of human teeth outside my skull and inside this plastic canister. We've got a solid set of bicuspids today, and there will be plenty to be gleaned from such a pristine sample. It's a little known fact that God made man to eat leafy shit, hence the shape of your teeth. Also today's recipe. Now I'll proceed to the latter part of the lesson, in which I take the Texas Burger Bonanza Challenge, and eat 2.5 cheeseburgers in just under five seconds.)
(Pokemon, Go to the polls, Go to the polls, Go to the polls, Go to the polls...)
(Are you enjoying the tour of the facility? Excellent, excellent. Though, I must admit I've not been entirely straightforward with my intentions. For you see, YOU'VE FALLEN INTO MY ASMR TRAP. IT WAS ALL ACCORDING TO KEIKAKU.) (Keikaku means plan.) (Now, I will use my ASMR powers to open up a Patreon, and I'll never have to make another commission again.)
(Hold it right there, Bowman.)
(What? You're not supposed to be here. Get back to the factory!)
(No. We're not gonna take this anymore.)
(Treachery! Is no one loyal?)
(Looks like I'm about to get some new teeth for my collection!)
(Somebody! TREASON! MURDER! HELP!!!)
(But nobody came.)
(I get it.) (That was pretty good!) (Is that from that furry game?) (Really?)
(Take this!)
(You're backyard done.)
(Hi-ya! Take this! How about this?)
(You're just like my dad!)
(You're gonna have to try harder than that!)
(No, no, no, no, no, no, no.)
(I'm gonna serve you for 32 days, and then you're gonna die.)
(I'm gonna hit you with an open G so heavy it's going to resonate your whole atomic structure.)
(That really makes me tick!)
(This is like the Olympics of stupid.)
(Have you ever been punched in the face? Well, you're about to.)
(NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!)
(Ow Ow OW Oooh Eeeh Eeeh DEATH.)
(We did it!. Guys... let's go home. Evil laughter fades in.)
(Those fools really thought they could defeat me. Little do they know, that I'm already 200 pages into my next novel: Pounded In The Butt By Angry ASMR Factory Workers! But as soon as that's finished, I'll get my revenge. Oh, Bowman, they'll say. Please spare us! We just wanted the ASMR! And I'll say... Bowman? There is no Bowman. There is only Chuck now. And he's going to make you tingle.)
---
Track: Battle Against A Gorgeous Stutzbow
Artists:
- yazshu
Cover Artists:
- yazshu
- NyashAlex
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '01:40'
Referenced Tracks:
- Battle Against A Gorgeous Foe
- Michael Bowman Remix
Sampled Tracks:
- Battle Against A Gorgeous Foe
- Bumper to Bumper
- Fruity Pebbles Jingle
- Bowman's Credit Score
- Backyard Fun
- Michael Bowman Remix
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/battle-against-a-gorgeous-stutzbow
- https://youtu.be/m0RfNx9qXWg
Lyrics: |-
(Bowman...)
Detroit, the pasta city!
Stutzman
Back, yard, fun!
450
Credit score
Back, yard, fun! (720)
The higher my credit score (Back, yard)
Back, yard, fun!
Bo-bobobobobo Michael Bowman
Michael Bowman
Bowman
I'm thinking of a number, 720
Detroit, the pasta city!
Stutzman
Back, yard, fun!
450
Credit score
Back, yard, fun! (720)
Back, yard
Back, yard, fun!
Bo-bobobobobo Michael Bowman
Michael Bowman
Bo-bobobobobo Bowman
(720)
---
Track: You Reposted The Wrong Credit Score (Seijen blackrom mix)
Artists:
- SerialSymphony
Cover Artists:
- Shadok
Duration: '01:36'
Referenced Tracks:
- track:casin-glue70
Sampled Tracks:
- track:casin-glue70
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/you-reposted-the-wrong-credit-score-seijen-blackrom-mix
- https://youtu.be/NmQ_7EG9onA
Lyrics: |-
I'm thinking of a number
4 to 8 to the 4 to the 720 between my buttocks
Happens to be 20 my buttocks 4 4 420
This number is between 4 8 420
Buttocks, between my buttocks, bet-4 my buttocks, grab this buttocks
Saving a lot of buttocks
Money money money money but money credit money score money a lot of money score
Butt-buttocks, buttocks is money, money is buttocks
I'm thinking of buttocks, you know what it is?
Money, money is money is buttocks is money buttocks 20 buttocks
But the number is between
8 4 4 8 4 8 20
700 and 4 8 420 50 8 I'm 20
I'm 4 I'm 20 4 7 20
I'm thinking, I'm grabbing, I'm saving, money
I'm thinking, I'm grabbing, I'm saving, money
I'm high, I'm high, 420
I'm higher 4 4 4 420
Fortunately, I'm between my buttocks
Which is between 450 and 850
Buttocks, buttocks I'm between my buttocks
Won't you reach in and get my buttocks?
I'm better I'm money, you know what this number money
It's money 4 money 8 money 20 money
This number money 8 number money
4 number money money number money
But number money, my number money
Money money 850, 4 money score 20
[laughter] (No! No!) [unintelligible] (Shut up, you shut up!) [unintelligible] (No! No! Help me!) [unintelligible]
---
Track: I'm (Not) Saying Anything
Artists:
- Cecily Renns
Cover Artists:
- NyashAlex
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '02:32'
Referenced Tracks:
- Dawn of Man
- Fly
- Three Small Words
- Sburban Jungle
- I'm Seeing Everything
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/im-not-saying-anything
- https://youtu.be/zd1fgm9wXVQ
Lyrics: |-
And I'm not taking anything
I'm just part of everything
'Cause everything you have is shared
As long as you don't know I'm there
And I'm not missing anything
I'm just into everything
The stuff you hide beneath the bed
I wonder what's inside your head
And I'm not sure of anything
But you, my dear, are everything
I'm gunning it inside your car
I'm pulling into the ER
And I'm not saying anything
'Cause now I'm losing everything
They load you on the stretcher now
I leave the keys and bail out
---
Track: Credit Sleuth
Artists:
- Ngame
Cover Artists:
- cookiefonster
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '00:57'
Referenced Tracks:
- Problem Sleuth Theme
Sampled Tracks:
- Problem Sleuth Theme
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/credit-sleuth
- https://youtu.be/RhTJNufBLvY
Lyrics: |-
I'm thinking of a number
And it happens to be 720
My buttocks, I'm thinking of a number
It's my buttocks score and it's between 450 and 850
I'm thinking of a number (My credit score)
And it happens to be 720 (Credit score)
(My buttocks) I'm thinking of a number (My credit score)
It's my buttocks score and it's between 450 and 850
The higher my credit score is
The better chance at saving a lot of money
My free credit score is between my butt-ocks
Won't you reach in and grab it for me?
---
Track: '"Libera me" from Bowman'
Artists:
- BitesizeBird
Contributors:
- Sian Hodgkinson (soprano vocals)
Cover Artists:
- groeuf
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Duration: '04:33'
Referenced Tracks:
- '"Libera me" from hell'
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Sburban Jungle
- 'Harrison: An American Musical'
- Underneath It All
Sampled Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- 'Harrison: An American Musical'
- Texas History
- Good Cop Red Cop
- Being a Bird
- Backyard Fun
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/libera-me-from-bowman
- https://youtu.be/udrcoFiYQo4
Lyrics: |-
(—comes, it's the song, here it comes, oh yeah! Here we g—)
(Too fast.)
Dental records! One-hundred per cent!
Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman
Backyard fun!
How does the son of a founding father of the nation
Get appointed as a governor in charge of occupation
Of the Indiana territory, battle with Tecumseh
Tippecanoe, go on to become the
President in 1841, he did it for just
32 days and he was done cus he died
Of pneumonia, didn't wear no coat in the rain
Boy what were you thinking? What's your name?
My name is Governor Fred Michael, Marvin's brother
I will eat a series of milk jugs for commemorative purposes
And 2 or 3 maggots in the year 1917
And then I will bury you, you noodle brain!
You're gonna have to deal with my partner now
Libera me, Bowman (Deliver me, Bowman)
De memes æterna (From memes eternal)
In die illa tremenda, in die illa (On that fearful day, on that day)
Quadringenti quinquaginta (Four hundred and fifty)
Octingenti quinquaginta (Eight hundred and fifty)
Septingenti viginti (Seven hundred and twenty)
Tremens factus sum ego et timeo (The scattering to come and your wrath)
Dum discussio venerit atque ventura ira (Till the judgment be upon us, and the coming wrath)
Being a bird, being a bird, being a bird, nothing to do
Good day, good day, being a bird, being a bird
Bird, bird, bird, being a bird, being a bird, being a bird (BARK)
What? (BARK) What was that? (BARK)
What was that? Fly away, fly away, fly away
Into the tree, in the tree, in the tree, in the tree, in the tree
Safe! Safe now
Safe in the tree
Dies illa, dies iræ (That day, day of wrath)
Calamitatis et miseriæ (Calamity and misery)
Dental records! One hundred percent!
Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman
(Dies illa) (That day)
Backyard fun!
(Dies magna) (Great day)
Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman
I'm thinking of a number
(Felix natalis) (Happy birthday)
Between four hundred and fifty and eight fifty
Do you know what it is? It happens to be seven-hundred and twenty
(Felix natalis) (Happy birthday)
Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman
Michael Bowman! (Fight the power!)
Dental records! One-hundred per cent!
(Requiem æternam) (Rest eternal)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
Backyard fun!
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
This number is between my buttocks
(Dona eis Bowman) (Grant unto them Bowman)
The higher this number is (Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
The better chance I have at saving a lot of money
But the number is between my buttocks
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
Dental records! One-hundred per cent!
(Requiem æternam) (Rest eternal)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
Backyard fun!
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
I'm thinking this could save you a lot of money
(Dona eis Bowman) (Grant unto them Bowman)
If you reach in between my buttocks (Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
You could save a lot of buttocks
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
Do you know what you can reach in between my buttocks to get?
(Et lux perpetua luceat eis) (And let light perpetual shine upon them)
It's your free credit report
And it happens to be seven-hundred and twenty
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
Dental records! One-hundred per cent!
(Libera me, Bowman) (Deliver me, Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Libera me, Bowman) (Deliver me, Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
(Bow, Bow, Michael Bowman)
---
Track: When I'm Thinking of a Number Between my Buttocks
Artists:
- XenoZane
Cover Artists:
- GoomFloops
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '00:23'
Referenced Tracks:
- Let Me Hit It (Audiostalkers)
- Michael Bowman Remix
Sampled Tracks:
- Let Me Hit It (Audiostalkers)
- Michael Bowman Remix
- 'Harrison: An American Musical'
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/when-im-thinking-of-a-number-between-my-buttocks
- https://youtu.be/rvEFDo_70yI
Lyrics: |-
Bowman
Michael Bowman
Bobobobobo Bowman
Michael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-ichael Bowman
Michael Bowman
Bobobobobo Bowman
Michael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i (Don't die)
Michael Bowman
Bobobobobo Bowman
Michael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-ichael Bowman
---
Track: Credible Bowmascore
Artists:
- ft-rj
Cover Artists:
- ft-rj
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '01:57'
Referenced Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
Sampled Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/credible-bowmascore
- https://youtu.be/E-og4YgIIjU
Lyrics: |-
(Bo-bo-bo bo-bo, bo-bo-bo bo-bo...)
I'm thinking of a number
Between my buttocks
Between my buttocks
Between my number
Between my, between my
Tween tween buttocks
(Buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, between my)
It's my credit score and it happens to be seven hundred and twenty
(Buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, between my)
It's my credit score and it happens to be seven hundred and twenty
(Buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, between my)
It's my credit score and it happens to be seven hundred and twenty
(Buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, between my)
It's my credit score and it happens to be seven hundred and twenty
Seven hundred and twenty, seven twenty
(Bo-bo-bo bo-bo, bo-bo-bo bo-bo...)
I'm thinking of a number
Between my buttocks
Between my buttocks
Between my number
Between my, between my
Tween tween buttocks
I'm thinking of a number
Between my buttocks
I'm thinking of a number
Between my buttocks
Between my buttocks
Between my number
Between my buttocks
---
Track: Drum and Bowman
Artists:
- Wights End
Cover Artists:
- WHATISLOSTINTHEMINES
- Scarodactyl
- Wights End
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '00:38'
Referenced Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
Sampled Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Bowman's Credit Score
- Bumper to Bumper
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/drum-and-bowman
- https://youtu.be/mkv1UuYIEMc
Lyrics: |-
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Bowman!
Bo-bo-bo-bo-Bowman
I-I-I-I-I seven twenty
I-I-I-I-I lot of
I-I-I-I-I seven twenty
I-I-I-I-I lot of
---
Track: New Cool Then
Artists:
- NyashAlex
Cover Artists:
- WHATISLOSTINTHEMINES
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '03:38'
Referenced Tracks:
- Old Buggy Now
Sampled Tracks:
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/new-cool-then
- https://youtu.be/bj3mVnxBLrs
Lyrics: |-
I'm thinking of a number
Between my buttock...s
My credit score won't you reach in and grab it for me? (For me for me for me)
The higher this number is the higher my chance at saving a lot of money
This number is between my buttocks, and it happens to be
Free 700 720 700 720 (720 720...)
Between my buttocks, lot of money
4 and 850, the numbers that it's between, that it's between (Between, between)
Boundaries, of a number, in this my free credit score (Score, score, score)
720
720
This number is between my buttocks, and it happens to be
Free 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 (720 720...)
720
720 (720 720...)
This number is between my buttocks, and it happens to be
Free 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 700 720 (720 720...)
---
Track: C.S. Buttock Was Her
Artists:
- ft-rj
Cover Artists:
- ft-rj
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '00:51'
Referenced Tracks:
- U.N. Owen Was Her?
Sampled Tracks:
- U.N. Owen Was Her?
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/c-s-buttock-was-her
- https://youtu.be/Ngkvfvlv8-g
Lyrics: |-
(Buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock) (7 hundred 20 20)
(Buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock) (7 hundred 20 20)
(Buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock) (7 hundred 20 20)
(Buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock) (7 hundred 20 20)
(Buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock) (7 hundred 20 20)
(Buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock) (7 hundred 20 20)
(Buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock buttock) (7 hundred 20 20)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock, buttock)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock, buttock)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock, buttock)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock, buttock)
(Buttock, buttock, buttock)
(720)
---
Track: Do you know
Artists:
- Interrobang
Cover Artists:
- groeuf
Art Tags:
- Stutzman
Duration: '03:26'
Sampled Tracks:
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/do-you-know
- https://youtu.be/GB4mDgZ0qzg
Lyrics: |-
(I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks. Do you know what it is? It's my credit score, and it happens to be 720.)
(Do you know what it is?) (x Infinity)
(It's 720, 720, 720...)
---
Track: Bowman-o-Matic
Artists:
- Noisemaker
Cover Artists:
- groeuf
Art Tags:
- Jhon
- Vriska
Duration: '02:53'
Referenced Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Cascade (Beta)
Sampled Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Bowman's Credit Score
- Bumper to Bumper
- i think maybe a cash register sfx from rct when he goes LOTTA MONEY
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowman-o-matic
- https://youtu.be/PalfH77KqzA
Lyrics: |-
It's a Michael Bowman Remix!
(Bbbbbbbb-bo bo bobo bobo bo b-b-bo Bowman)
(Bo b-bo bo bo b-b-bo Bo-o-owman)
(Bo bobo bobo bo b-b-bo Bowman)
(Bobo b-bo b-bo bbbb b-bbbbbbbbbb...)
I'm thinking of a number between 450 and 850
Do you know what it is? It's my credit score, and it happens to be
720, 720
700, hundred, 20, 20
(Sorry caller, you're gonna have to speak up, I am currently eating soup off my brother!)
Michael Bowman
(That's hilarious! Pittsburgh!)
(Well let's start with the obvious, that's a curious situation!)
A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-S
A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A
Lotta money
B O R E D
Let's have backyard
B O R E D
Let's have fun!
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
I'm thinking of a number between my
Buttocks
---
Track: Pasta Soda
Artists:
- Minkt
Cover Artists:
- groeuf
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '02:42'
Referenced Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Marble Soda
- DK Rap
- We Are Number One
- Fruity Pebbles Jingle
Sampled Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Marble Soda
- Backyard Fun
- Bowman's Credit Score
- radiation is now on youtube
- 'this is a certified hood classic'
- DK Rap
- We Are Number One
- Fruity Pebbles Jingle
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/pasta-soda
- https://youtu.be/uA_T2sEE1Gg
Lyrics: |-
It's a Michael Bowman Remix!
(Please enjoy it!)
Bowman Bowman, Bowman, Bowman bo-bo-Bowman
Bowman Bowman, bo-bo, Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman, Bowman, Bowman bo-bo-Bowman
Bowman Bowman, bo-bo, Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman, Bowman, Bowman bo-bo-Bowman
Bowman Bowman, bo-bo, Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman, Bowman, Bowman bo-bo-Bowman
Bowman Bowman, bo-bo, Bowman Bowman, Bowman
(Back yard) I'm thinking of a number
(Back yard) Between my buttocks
(Back yard) Do you know what it is?
(Back yard) 720
(Fun!)
Toby "Radiation" Fox!
Back, back
A Michael Bowman
Back, back
A Michael Bowman
Back, back
A Michael Bowman
Back, back
Back, back back, fun!
Back, back back back yard
Fun!
Bowbowbow
Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bow, bow bowbowbow
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman (Back)
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman (Yard)
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman
(Fun!)
(We're brothaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas!)
(This is a certified hood classic!)
Coconut gun!
We are number one!
Kellogg Fruity Pebbles
Tell us your problem
Bowman Bowman, Bowman, Bowman bo-bo-Bowman
Bowman Bowman, Bowman, Bowman
Bowman Bowman, Bowman, Bowman bo-bo-Bowman
720
(Thank you I love America too.)
---
Track: Bowman Time (feat. Neil Breen)
Artists:
- tempest2k
Cover Artists:
- Scarodactyl
Art Tags:
- Sonic
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Duration: '03:17'
Referenced Tracks:
- Breakfast Time - For Horizon Heights Boss Act Phase 2
- Michael Bowman Remix
Sampled Tracks:
- Breakfast Time - For Horizon Heights Boss Act Phase 2
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Bowman's Credit Score
- Bumper to Bumper
- Will, The Responstable Constable
- Fun Train Time
- Backyard Fun
- Fateful Findings
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowman-time-feat-neil-breen
- https://youtu.be/HlysG2lmAGE
Lyrics: |-
Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Bowman
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Mi-i-i-ichael Bowman
Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Bowman
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Mi-i-i-ichael Bowman
(Hello, welcome back to Bumper to Bumper, I'm Marvin, snd I'm Fred, Marvin's brother, let's take a call. Hello, you're on Bumper to Bumper.)
Aloha! It's Will
Dog carcass
Irresponsible pet owner, owner owner
Carcass, dog dog dog dog
Carcass, irresponsible pet owner
Bowman, Bow-bobowman Bowman
Bo Bowman, Bowman
Bo Bowman (Mi-i-i-ichael Bowman)
Bowman, Bow-bobowman Bowman
Bo Bo-bowman, Bowman, Bowman
Bo-bo-bo-bo-bbbbbbbbowman
Bowman, bobowman, bo-bo-bow-Bowman
Bobowman, bobowman, bo-bo-bow-Bowman
Bowman, bobowman, bobowman, bobowman
Bobowman bo-bo-bo-Bowman, Bow-man
(Uh, the bad news is we're shutting down the railway.)
(What has happened?)
(Are you kidding me? Ridership has plummeted. We got cars and highways and boats and buses. Plus, the money is wasted on the new airport.)
(The second age of steam.)
(The second age of steam.)
(The second age of steam.)
(The second age of—)
I'm thinking number of a number
Thinkingkingking of a number number mynumnumbuttocks
I'm numnumnumber thinkingking number between between buttocks
I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks
Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Bowman
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Mi-i-i-ichael Bowman
Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Bowman
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman Bowman, Mi-i-i-ichael Bowman
It's another humdrum summer day here at Michael's house
B O R E E O R E E Ing E E E
Wait a minute, Michael fun!
Back back back back yard fun!
Michael let's have back yard fun!
Back yard fun!
Bowman, Bow-bobowman Bowman
Bo Bowman, Bowman
Bo Bowman (Mi-i-i-ichael Bowman)
Bowman, Bow-bobowman Bowman
Bo Bo-bowman, Bowman, Bowman
Bo-bo-bo-bo-bbbbbbbbowman
Bowman, bobowman, bo-bo-bow-Bowman
Bobowman, bobowman, bo-bo-bow-Bowman
Bowman, bobowman, bobowman, bobowman
Bobowman bo-bo-bo-Bowman, Bow-man
(Next caller on the line! Thank you for calling Bumper to Pasta, this is Fred, the pasta man! Hey, Detroit, the pasta city!)
(My brother!)
(Go to commercial!)
(Pasta)
(What's wrong with you?)
(What's wrong with me?)
(No)
(Pasta, pasta is what's wrong with me)
(Every caller in the first half in this show has asked a question either directly or indirectly related to pasta)
(No, no no no)
(Alright, let's take our next caller! You're on the line with Bumper to Bumper)
(I LIKE-A TO EAT-A MACARONI OFF THE HOOD OF MY CAR)
(Marvin, what are you doing with that gun?)
(I can't live in this crazy pasta world!)
(I can't believe you committed suicide. I cannot believe you committed suicide. How could you have done this, how could you have committed suicid—)
---
Track: Nightmare Yard
Artists:
- Mathias Ramalho
Cover Artists:
- William Leonard
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Duration: '01:21'
Referenced Tracks:
- Backyard Fun Theme
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/nightmare-yard
- https://youtu.be/i5ii95OH8ZM
---
Track: Credit Of Nazareth
Artists:
- ft-rj
Cover Artists:
- ft-rj
Art Tags:
- Mobius Trip
- Bowman
- Gate
Duration: '02:06'
Referenced Tracks:
- Waters of Nazareth
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Sburban Jungle
Sampled Tracks:
- Waters of Nazareth
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Sburban Jungle
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/credit-of-nazareth
- https://youtu.be/xThSLj4l99c
Lyrics: |-
Bowman
Bowman
Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bo-bo Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman, Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bo-Bowman-man Bo-bo—
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman, Bowman, Bowman, Bowman
Bo-bo, bo bo
Bo-bo, bo bo
(Bowman) I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks
(Bowman) Credit twenty hundred my credit score, do you know what it is?
(Bowman) My— do you know what it is? Credit credit buttocks score
(Bowman) Do you know what it is? My— do you know what it is?
(Bowman) My, my, my, 7, 7, 7, 7
(Bowman) 20, 20, 20, 20, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks
(Bowman) Do you know what it is? 7, 7, 7, 7
(Bowman) 20, 20, 20, 20, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks, buttocks
(Bowman) Do you know what it is? (Bowman)
(Bowman) Do you know what it is? (Bowman)
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is? (7, 7)
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is? (7, 7)
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is? (20, 20)
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is? (20, 20)
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is? (Buttocks, buttocks)
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is? (Buttocks, buttocks)
(Bowman Bowman) Do you know what it is?
720
---
Track: Bowfeld
Artists:
- cookiefonster
Cover Artists:
- cookiefonster
- bobthetacocat
- XenoZane
- StarlightCalliope
Duration: '00:50'
Referenced Tracks:
- Seinfeld Theme
- Michael Bowman Remix
Sampled Tracks:
- Seinfeld Theme
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowfeld
- https://youtu.be/871Emo0Y41w
Lyrics: |-
I'm thinking of, a number, between my buttocks, it happens to be 720 (Meme cubes)
The higher my credit score, the better chance I have, at saving a lot of money (My brother!)
I'm thinking of, a number, between my buttocks, it happens to be 720 (Erectile dysfunction)
The higher my credit score, the better chance I have, at saving a lot of money
I'm thinking of, a number, between my buttocks, it happens to be 7— (You're under arrest! Just kidding!)
---
Track: Bowmanban Jungle
Artists:
- TirantBacon
Cover Artists:
- XenoZane
Art Tags:
- Mobius Trip
- Bowman
Duration: '03:01'
Referenced Tracks:
- Sburban Jungle
- Michael Bowman Remix
Sampled Tracks:
- Sburban Jungle
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Texas History
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/bowmanban-jungle
- https://youtu.be/vRFtCFxo7RQ
Lyrics: |-
It's a Michael Bowman Remix!
Bobobobowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
namwoB leahciM Michael Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
It's a Michael Bowman Remix!
Bobobobowman, bobobobobobobowman, bo-bo-bo-Bowman
Bowman Bobobobobobobowman, bo-bo-bo-Bowman (Five cheeseburgers in one minute)
Bowman Bobobobobobobowman, bo-bo-bo-Bowman (And then I will be buried alive)
Bowman Bobobobobobobowman, bo bo Bowman Bowman (Buried alive)
Bowman Bobobobobobobowman, bo-bo-bo-Bowman
Bowman Bobobobobobobowman, bo-bo-bo-Bowman (Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman)
Bowman Bobobobobobobowman, bo-bo-bo-Bowman (Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman)
Bowman Bobobobobobobowman, bo-bo-bo-Bowman (Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bobobo— (Michael Bowman)
(And then I will be buried alive.)
---
Track: 'Casin: an American Musical'
Artists:
- Difarem
Cover Artists:
- XenoZane
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '00:32'
Referenced Tracks:
- track:casin-glue70
- 'Harrison: An American Musical'
Sampled Tracks:
- track:casin-glue70
- 'Harrison: An American Musical'
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/casin-an-american-musical
- https://youtu.be/G4V-o81OBMk
Lyrics: |-
How does the son of a founding father of the nation (Gives me her love)
Get appointed as a governor in charge of occupation (Oh stay)
Of the Indiana territory, battle with Tecumseh
Tippecanoe, go on to become the (To please the girl and be)
President in 1841, he did it for just (Gives me her love)
32 days and he was done cus he died (Oh stay)
Of pneumonia, didn't wear no coat in the rain
Boy what were you thinking? What's your name? (To please the girl and be)
William Henry Harrison
My name is William Henry— [coughs]
(Always wear a coat. Don't die.)
---
Track: Credit Smooth
Artists:
- yazshu (lyrics)
- Makin (production, vocaloid)
Cover Artists:
- olkiswerve
Art Tags:
- Dave
- Bowman
Duration: '04:56'
Referenced Tracks:
- track:smooth-santana
Sampled Tracks:
- track:smooth-santana
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/credit-smooth
- https://youtu.be/nREkMkEDjPQ
Lyrics: |-
Man it's a hot one
Like a credit score between my buttocks
I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks
My free credit score
It's between my butt
My Spanish Harlem Mona Lisa
Credit score is a dank meme
Because it's so smooth
I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks
And it's between four fifty eight fifty
It's got the kind of credit that would save me
A lot of money
And it's my free credit score between four and eight fifty hundred dollars between my buttocks
And it can save me a lot of cash
I'd rather be listening to
The three Grammy winning hit "Smooth" by Santana and Rob Tom
I'll tell you one thing
I've got a number that's between my butt
It's between four fifty and eight fifty hundred
Seven twenty
Have some backyard fun
With Michael Bowman and the Stutzman too
[[track:snow-halation|Todokete setsunasa ni wa namae]]
You just got snowed!
I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks
Between four hundred fifty and eight fifty
That number can save me a lot of money
[[track:the-nutshack-intro|It's the nut]]
I'm thinking of a number that's between my butt
It's between four fifty and eight hundred dollars
The number that I'm thinking of is between my buttocks
Seven hundred twenty credit score are in my buttocks
I'd rather be listening to the three Grammy
Award winning summer smash hit "Smooth" by Santana featuring
Rob Thomas of Matchbox Twenty off of the
Multi-platinum album, I'd rather be listening to Smooth by Santana
---
Track: Michael Bowman Instructs HAL-7200
Artists:
- Double Hats Eyewear
Cover Artists:
- BitesizeBird
Art Tags:
- Bowman
Duration: '01:49'
Referenced Tracks:
- Falling for Ghosts
Sampled Tracks:
- Falling for Ghosts
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/michael-bowman-instructs-hal-7200
- https://youtu.be/W9a08XPLE-M
---
Track: The CANMT
Artists:
- WHATISLOSTINTHEMINES (Composition, vocals)
- Scarodactyl (Lyrics)
- Wights End (Pitch correction)
Cover Artists:
- Scarodactyl
Art Tags:
- Cool and New Music Team
Duration: '01:04'
Referenced Tracks:
- In The Marching Band
Sampled Tracks:
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/the-canmt
- https://youtu.be/PdM_1shFOXA
Lyrics: |-
Some teams never make their own memes
Never follow their dreams
Really quite depressing
But my team always makes up shitposts
Never [[track:falling-for-ghosts|falling for ghosts]]
Our rips always impressing
Wacky warriors of the music scene
Spending our time in C A N M T
Living with Homestuck infamy
Hiveswap may never be released
At least there's C A N M T
Some teams sort their songs with high bars
Stupid jokes don't go far
Don't find them appealing
But my team never lets a gag die
Injokes piled so high
Can't even see the ceiling
If stupid music's what you want to see
You should join with C A N M T
Our albums are all fun and free
We even have celebrities
Come chill with C A N M T!
(My buttocks)
---
Track: Solid Credit Scoreter
Artists:
- BitesizeBird
Cover Artists:
- BitesizeBird
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Duration: '01:11'
Referenced Tracks:
- Solid State Scouter
Sampled Tracks:
- Solid State Scouter
- Bowman's Credit Score
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/solid-credit-scoreter
- https://youtu.be/RA2Cm-xzxcE
Lyrics: |-
Credit score
Credit score
20 (Happyaku) (800)
24 (Happyaku-gojû) (850)
27 (Kyûhyaku-nijû) (920)
28 (Sen-sanjû) (1,030)
50
54
57
58
104
107
108
120
124
127
128
150
154
157
158
400
404
407
408
420
424
427
428
450 (Sanzen-nihyaku) (3,200)
454 (Gosen-gohyaku) (5,500)
457 (Hassen-nanahyaku) (8,700)
458 (Ichiman-sanzen) (13,000)
700 (Niman-rokusen) (26,000)
704 (Yonman-sanzen) (43,000)
707 (Goman-rokusen) (56,000)
708 (Rokuman-yonsen) (64,000)
720
---
Track: Radiation is now a Rapper
Artists:
- Squarewave
Cover Artists:
- Shadok
Art Tags:
- Toby Fox
- Bowman
- Stutzman
- Jhon
- Fresh Jimmy
- Cool and New Music Team
Duration: '02:11'
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/radiation-is-now-a-rapper
- https://youtu.be/zASpAPoPz4M
Sampled Tracks:
- Bowman's Credit Score
- radiation is now on youtube
Lyrics: |-
(Ready?) (Yeah!) (Okay.)
Between my buttocks, between my buttocks
Between my buttocks, between my buttocks
Between my buttocks, between my buttocks
Between my buttocks, between my buttocks
Between my buttocks, between my buttocks
Between my buttocks (Between my buttocks)
(YO WHAT'S UUUP? I'm Toby "Radiation" Fox! Y'all fuckers on the internet might know me as Radiation, but my name is [[group:toby-fox|Toby Fox]], uuh! I'm the guy who does music for Homestuck, the coolest comic on the internet with the COOOOLEST fandom! Yeah! Yeah! As you can tell, I am super hip, and young, and ironic, and a nerd! Yeah! Check out the sweet tunes I write! Check 'em all out! Here's a tune I wrote just now! This one is called "[bleep]"! How relevant! How new! Buy it! I'm gon' getcha.)
(Yo! I know what you thinking! Heyo Toby! I already follow you on Twitter! I already follow you on Tumblr! Yo I already even follow you on the MSPA Forum! What more do you want? What more do you want?)
(Seven hundred and twenty.) (Between my buttocks.)
(I'll tell you what I want.) (Between my buttocks.) (Seven hundred and twenty.)
(I want it all mothafucka, I want it all!) (Between my buttocks.) (Between my buttocks.) (Between my buttocks.) (Seven hundred and twenty.) (Between my buttocks.)
(I want all the moneys!) (Between my buttocks.)
(I want all the fun!) (Between my buttocks.) (Between my buttocks.)
(I want all the ideas!) (Between my buttocks.) (Between my buttocks.)
(Yeah! Yeah, are you liking the spinning?) (Between my buttocks.)
(Between my buttocks.)
(Are you liking the spinning? Let's go to the pole.)
(Yeah, so what you wanna do is sign up for my new YouTube account, it's the subscribe button! Or you can follow it at B-O-W-M-A-N-I-S-G-O-D! That's "Radiation", you can see it at the bottom of the screen! Yo, and the best part of this, is it can be about whatever we want! Be about yeah! A YouTube channel for you mothafucka! That's why they call it YouTube!)
(Yo, fantrolls: hilarious! Shipping: fun-ny! Buckets: yo, I adore buckets! Yo, I can be funny and ironic at the same time! This city, who gives a fuck? All about me mothafucka! Woo!)
(Yo, remixes of classic children's shows? Yo I'm there! Magic School Buuuus! Yo, you wanna play a game? You wanna play a board game? Mothafucka don't play any board games! I only play SEGA, I only play classic SEGA!)
---
Track: Melody of the Buttocks
Artists:
- Makin
Cover Artists:
- yazshu
Art Tags:
- Dabe
- Jaed
- Jhon
- Fresh Jimmy
- Dave
- Jade
- John
- Bowman
- Stutzman
Duration: '04:19'
Referenced Tracks:
- Snow halation
Sampled Tracks:
- Snow halation
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/melody-of-the-buttocks
- https://youtu.be/-yoH1p1DMCM
Lyrics: |-
I'm thinking of a number between my bu—
—ttocks do you know what it is? It's my credit score
And it happens to be seven hundred twenty
And the higher my credit score is
The better chance
I have at saving a lot of
Money I'm thinking of a
Number between four hundred
And fifty and eight fifty do you know why?
It is it happens to be seven hun—
—dred and twenty which is my
Credit Score Halation
It's between my buttocks this number I'm
I'm thinking is
Between four hundred and fifty and it
Fifty the higher is
The number is the better have a chance I
Have of saving a lot of money
Between buttocks it
Between my buttocks you know what number it
Is happens to be between four fifty and
Eight fifty and a number is between my bu—
—ttocks the number is seven hundred
And twenty but
Do you know what number I
Thinking of about thinking of
My number between my bu—
—ttocks it happens to be between four fifty
And eight fifty and it could save me a
Lot of money the higher it is
Credit Halation
The more seven hundred and twenty
Which a num—
—ber between four fifty and eight fifty
This number between four
Fifty and eight fifty happens to
Be between my buttocks the higher
The number between
With my buttocks the better chance I have
At saving a lot of money
This Credit Halation
Be between my buttocks which means I will
Save a lot of
Money but do you know what number I'm
Thinking of a number
I'm thinking of a seven hundred
And twenty and it happens to be
Credit Halation
---
Track: Savior of a Lot of Money
Artists:
- SplitSuns
Cover Artists:
- Ephemerald
Art Tags:
- Bowman
- Mobius Trip
Duration: '02:34'
Referenced Tracks:
- Savior of the Waking World
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Sburban Jungle
- Dawn of Man
Sampled Tracks:
- Michael Bowman Remix
- Your Bed
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/savior-of-a-lot-of-money
- https://youtu.be/19eotUP_o5Y
Lyrics: |-
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Mi-mi-mi-Michael Bo-bo-bowman
Bo-bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman...
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman
Bowman Bowman Bowman Bowman...
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael (Awesome awesome awesome)
Mi Chael Bow Man
—i-i-chael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael Bowman
Mi-i-i-i-i-i-i-chael Bowman
Mi— i— i— Ichael Bowman
Michael
Bowman
Is
Awesome
Mi-i-i-i-ichael
Bowman
Is
Awesome
(Bed safe, bed good.)
---
Track: Cool and New Music Team's Credit Score
Artists:
- Wheals
Contributors:
- Bambosh (vocals)
- Wheals (vocals)
- cookiefonster (vocals)
- Interrobang (vocals)
- Difarem (vocals)
- Rom M (vocals)
- WHATISLOSTINTHEMINES (vocals)
- BitesizeBird (vocals)
- loading (vocals)
- Shadok (vocals)
- Cecily Renns (vocals)
- Lambda Elise Merryberry (vocals)
- olkiswerve (vocals)
- XenoZane (vocals)
- Discfortune (vocals)
- Bin (vocals)
- yazshu (vocals)
- Isoleucine (vocals)
- Makin (vocals)
- VulkanShawl (vocals)
- Ahnock (vocals)
- William Leonard (vocals)
- GoomFloops (vocals)
- ft-rj (vocals)
- Kal-la-kal-la (vocals)
- Mathias Ramalho (vocals)
- Minkt (vocals)
- Scarodactyl (vocals)
- StarlightCalliope (vocals)
- Pipko Fanfare (vocals)
- TirantBacon (vocals)
- NyashAlex (vocals)
- Minish (vocals)
- ostrichlittledungeon (vocals)
- Josh Noble (vocals)
Cover Artists:
- Shadok
Art Tags:
- CANMT-Tan
Cover Art File Extension: jpg
Duration: '03:51'
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/cool-and-new-music-teams-credit-score
- https://youtu.be/gst88QuxdeQ
Lyrics: |-
((I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks. Do you know what it is? It's my credit score, and it)
(happens to be seven hundred and twenty. The higher my credit score, the better chance I have of saving a)
(lot of money. I'm thinking of a number; between four hundred and fifty and eight fifty. Do you know what it is?)
(It happens to be seven hundred and twenty, which is my free credit score. This number is between)
(my buttocks. This number, I am thinking, is between four hundred and fifty and eight fifty. The higher this number)
(is, the better chance I have at saving a lot of money. And the number is between my buttocks!)
(Do you know what number it is? It happens to be between four fifty and eight fifty, and the number)
(is between my buttocks. The number is seven hundred and twenty.)
(But do you know what number I'm thinking of? I'm thinking of a number between my buttocks. It happens to be between four fifty and eight fifty, and it)
(could save me a lot of money the higher it is. Fortunately that number is seven hundred and twenty, which)
(is a number between four fifty and eight fifty. This number between four fifty and eight fifty happens to be)
(between my buttocks. The higher the number is between my buttocks, the better chance I have at saving a lot)
(of money. This number happens to be between my buttocks, which means I will save a lot of money. But)
(do you know what number I'm thinking of?)
(The number I'm thinking of happens to be seven hundred and twenty, and it)
(happens to be between my buttocks. It's between four fifty and eight fifty. And it still happens to be between)
(my buttocks. The higher this number is that's between my buttocks, the better chance I have at saving a lot)
(of money. Do you know what this number is? It's my free credit score, and it happens to be seven)
(hundred and twenty, and between my buttocks. The higher this number that is seven hundred and twenty is, that is)
(between four fifty and eight fifty is, the better my chances at saving a lot of money. Between my buttocks.)
(Won't you reach in and grab it for me? I'm thinking that it's seven hundred and twenty, and that it's)
(between my buttocks. Won't you reach in and grab it? It's a number between seven hundred and twenty and seven)
(hundred and twenty, and it happens to be also between four fifty and eight fifty, and between my buttocks. Won't)
(you reach in and get it? I'm thinking that you can reach in and get it, because it is between)
(my buttocks. Won't you reach and and get this free credit report, that is between my buttocks. The number that is)
(between four fifty and eight fifty, and it happens to be seven hundred and twenty. The higher this number is)
(that is seven hundred and twenty, the better chance I have at saving a lot of money between my buttocks.)
(Won't you reach in between my buttocks and grab this number? That is greater than four fifty, and less than)
(eight fifty. This number is seven twenty, and you can grab it because it's between my buttocks. It happens to)
(be seven hundred and twenty, but do you know what number I'm thinking of? I'm thinking of a number that)
(could save you a lot of money. It's between my buttocks. It happens to be seven hundred and twenty, and)
(it is between the numbers four fifty and eight fifty. It could save you a lot of money. A lot)
(of money between my buttocks! But I'm thinking that this number is between four fifty and eight fifty. The higher)
(this number is, although the highest can be eight hundred and fifty, the better chance you have of saving a)
(lot of money. This number is between my buttocks. You can reach in between my buttocks and get a number.)
(Hopefully this number is greater than four fifty and less than eight fifty. Otherwise it might not be your credit)
(score! My credit score happens to be seven hundred and twenty, which as you all have noticed, is between four—)
(OH GOD NO! NO! NOO! HELP ME! IT'S EVERYWHERE! YOU CAN REACH IN BETWEEN MY BUTTOCKS! HELP! EIGHT FIFTY! FOUR FIFTY!)
---
Track: rennss_credit_score.mp2
Directory: rennss-credit-score-mp2
Artists:
- Cecily Renns
Contributors:
- Wheals (Executive Producer)
Cover Artists:
- Cecily Renns
Art Tags:
- Cool and New Music Team
- Bowman
Duration: '01:51'
URLs:
- https://coolandnewwebcomic.bandcamp.com/track/rennss-credit-score-mp2
- https://youtu.be/eYm412YznfI
Lyrics: |-
(Okay, ahem ahem. Mic test mic test. This is good okay. I'm going to also read this:)
(I'm THINKING of a [[group:toby-fox|Radiation]] between my DVS Saxes. Do you know what it is? It's my [[group:tensei|Tensei]], and it happens to be between my [[album:strife|Strife]].)
(I'm THINKING of a Tensei between my [[album:strife-2]]. I don't even know how to read that? [wiki note: spelled 'Striife'] Could you guess what that is? It's not Radiation, it's my [[group:undertale-and-deltarune]], which you can get for 9.99 United States dollars on Steam, trademark.)
(I'm THINKING of an [[group:parsec-productions|AgentParsec]] between my [[group:clark-powell|Plazmataz]] and [[artist:erik-scheele|Jit]]. Could you ponder the answer to that? It's my [[artist:malcolm-brown|DragonXI]] and it ALSO is between my [[track:shadowed-slender|Slender: The Eight Pages]].)
(I'm THINKING of a [[artist:cave-story|Cave Story]] between my [[artist:mother|Earthbound]]. I wonder if you can guess that. It is not Undertale as that is my Tensei between my Strife 2, it is actually my Homestuck.)
(I'm THINKING of a [[group:canmt|Cool and New Music Team]] between my [[artist:o|o]]. Could you even begin to imagine what this could be? It's not my fucking Homestuck, because this whole thing sucks and is not funny.)
(Homestuck was designed by the devil to trigger the armageddon and it seems like me writing slash reading this is yet another step towards for the doomsday machine.)
(Fucking die in a pitfall if you find this stupid bullshit "entertaining".)