« get me outta code hell

hsmusic-data - Data files for https://hsmusic.wiki - track, album, artist & flash info, etc
summary refs log tree commit diff
path: root/album/the-baby-is-june.yaml
diff options
context:
space:
mode:
Diffstat (limited to 'album/the-baby-is-june.yaml')
-rw-r--r--album/the-baby-is-june.yaml430
1 files changed, 430 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/album/the-baby-is-june.yaml b/album/the-baby-is-june.yaml
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..1ea436f5
--- /dev/null
+++ b/album/the-baby-is-june.yaml
@@ -0,0 +1,430 @@
+Album: The Baby is June
+Artists:
+- Funk McLovin
+Date: November 23, 2020
+Date Added: April 12, 2021
+URLs:
+- https://funkmclovin.bandcamp.com/album/the-baby-is-june
+- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVNREaFFhdM
+Has Track Art: false
+Cover Artists:
+- Funk McLovin
+Color: '#00c0ff'
+Groups:
+- Funk McLovin
+- Fandom
+---
+Track: Meat Nor Candy
+Contributors:
+- Funk McLovin (Dave)
+- AE (June)
+- Bucky Grant (Karkat)
+Duration: 0:37
+URLs:
+- https://funkmclovin.bandcamp.com/track/meat-nor-candy
+Lyrics: |-
+    DAVE: so june
+    DAVE: did you pick meat or candy
+    JUNE: dave??
+    JUNE: how did you know i was at a picnic?
+    DAVE: everyone knows
+    DAVE: its a super important choice with important ramifications
+    JUNE: what? oh man, this might be bad.
+    KARKAT: OH SWEET FUCK. WHAT DID YOU DO, JUNE.
+    DAVE: did you even go to the fucking picnic
+    JUNE: n- no? i... i...
+    DAVE: urgh
+    DAVE: fuck
+    DAVE: ugh
+    JUNE: dave, what's going on!
+    KARKAT: THERE'S NOTHING WE CAN DO, JUNE.
+    DAVE: i can only explain whats happening to me
+    DAVE: ngh
+    DAVE: in <i>song</i>
+---
+Track: Dave's Ballad
+Contributors:
+- Funk McLovin (Dave)
+- AE (June)
+- Bucky Grant (Karkat)
+Duration: '1:54'
+URLs:
+- https://funkmclovin.bandcamp.com/track/daves-ballad-2
+Lyrics: |-
+    I was walkin' down the street practicing some rhymes
+    Just like you do when you're the knight of time
+    When a realization struck me clear out the blue
+    In through the outdoor I pulled the wazoo
+
+    I saw the time foam in a paradox space
+    And faster than the bunny won the tortoise race
+    I knew you had to make a lun-choice
+    You had to utter two words with your very own voice
+
+    And June if you didn't then there's just one catch
+    If you didn't select one of Calliope's snacks
+    One final timeline that I know to be true
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+
+    JUNE: but dave...
+    JUNE: the tortoise won the race.
+    KARKAT: IT DOESN'T MATTER RIGHT NOW, JUNE.
+    KARKAT: FOCUS ON THE BABY PART.
+
+    Well I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I know this to be true
+
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    You better buy some tiny shoes
+
+    JUNE: how the hell does this even work??
+    DAVE: oh well im glad you asked
+
+    You'll remember in a time in a game called SBURB
+    When "ectobiologize" was the key verb
+    You made a bunch of shitty little baby clones
+    And sent them to the appropriate time zones
+
+    But along the way the wires got crossed
+    And out into the first ring baby June was tossed
+    You could see how this could be
+    A little problem metaphysically
+
+    Because if you're marooned in the depths of space
+    You couldn't make the baby clone of yourself in the first place
+    And now to complete the right time loop
+    I've been impregnated and the baby is you
+
+    Well I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I know this to be true (oooh!)
+
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you (...)
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    I'm having a baby and the baby is you
+    You better buy some tiny shoes
+
+    JUNE: dave, what the fuck.
+---
+Track: Karkat's Lament
+Contributors:
+- Bucky Grant (Karkat)
+Duration: '2:44'
+URLs:
+- https://funkmclovin.bandcamp.com/track/karkats-lament
+Lyrics: |-
+    I'm just a troll, a troll so enamored
+    With a man who speaks with that annoying stammer
+    In spite of his yammering and habits thereof
+    I wish there was a way to express my love
+
+    I've not been one for shows of affection
+    They're always taken in some awful direction
+    And uh, since I'm a troll and he's a human
+    Well I've got no template for wooing acumen
+
+    Now that I'm comfy with the time that I spend
+    Happy to be with him until the bitter end
+    Paradox space so cruelly descends
+    He's having a baby and the baby's my friend
+
+    Oh I'm just a troll, a troll so enamored
+    WIth a man who has- pff- zero manners
+    And just when I was poised to get used to him
+    Reality reminded me it's just too grim
+
+    But wishing my heart with a fatal twist
+    That I could love him in domestic bliss
+    But what I wanted wasn't goddamn this
+    Things weren't supposed to go amiss
+
+    But when you imagine a dispute of the heart
+    Something to drive two lovers apart
+    In the books that I read when I was a grub
+    There were strpies like passion and conflict and love
+
+    But in those tomes over which I pored
+    Reading about the quadrants that I adored
+    It wasn't a whisper or even a maybe
+    Of your boyfriend having his best friend's baby
+
+    [Pensive trumpet solo.]
+
+    I'm just a troll, a troll so enamored
+    Of a boy I can't help but chase after
+    Gestating my buddy in his gravid womb
+    I can't let this be Davekat's doom
+
+    I'm just a troll, a troll so enamored
+    With a man who speaks with that annoying stammer
+    In spite of his yammering and habits thereof
+    I wish there was a way to express my love
+---
+Track: June's Ode
+Contributors:
+- AE (June)
+- Funk McLovin (Dave)
+Duration: '2:44'
+URLs:
+- https://funkmclovin.bandcamp.com/track/junes-ode
+Lyrics: |-
+    DAVE: alright youll be able to see the ultrasound image on the monitor
+    DAVE: the miracle of life is wonderful dont you agree june
+    DAVE: uh
+    DAVE: june
+
+    That baby is me
+    It's plain to see
+    From the ultrasound image
+    And my friend's stomach
+    Looking so carefree
+
+    I've been through a lot
+    I've seen some shit
+    But this takes the cake
+    This one is it
+
+    I can't carry on
+    I can't wrap my brain
+    His stomach's distended a baby
+    With my own face
+
+    It's got my buckteeth
+    And my mischevious grin
+    Even more upsetting
+    I see my glasses on them
+
+    I try to shout
+    I try to scream
+    But I can't comprehend
+    The baby is me
+
+    My buddy Dave is pregnant
+    With a baby who is me
+    Seems surreal
+    What's the deal
+    He's swimming in Dave's pee
+
+    DAVE: its not pee june its amniotic fluid
+    DAVE: theres a big difference
+
+    (Hey while you guys are singing, do mind if I take a trumpet solo?)
+    (Sure thing doc, go right ahead.)
+
+    [Prenatal trumpet solo.]
+
+    A child in my bro
+    A wholeass baby kid
+    Not even the result
+    Of something I did
+
+    Dave is taking this well
+    What the fuck is his deal
+    I've been losing my mind
+    Is this how the virgin Mary feels
+
+    Look at their weird face
+    On the ultrasound screen
+    They're looking at me
+    God what could this mean
+
+    How can Dave sit there
+    With zero qualms
+    Is he a good dad
+    Am I a good mom
+
+    My buddy Dave is pregnant
+    With a baby who is me
+    Seems surreal
+    What's the deal
+    He's swimming in Dave's pee
+
+    DAVE: for the last time its not pee
+---
+Track: Off Brand
+Contributors:
+- AE (June)
+- Bucky Grant (Karkat)
+- Funk McLovin (Dave)
+Duration: '3:58'
+URLs:
+- https://funkmclovin.bandcamp.com/track/off-brand
+Lyrics: |-
+    JUNE: i hope dave is okay.
+    JUNE: what do you think will happen if something goes wrong?
+    JUNE: what if i evaporate, like in back to the future?
+    KARKAT: IT'LL BE FINE, JUNE.
+    JUNE: but i've been hearing trumpet playing from the delivery room this whole time.
+    KARKAT: NO DON'T WORRY, THAT'S JUST THE DOCTOR FROM TRACK FOUR.
+    JUNE: oh, right.
+
+    I know it's off brand
+    But I wouldn't worry
+    Dave's a strong sort of guy
+
+    He's a good dad
+    So we'd better hurry
+    And pull ourselves together, here's why
+
+    Through these nine months
+    I've hemmed and I've hawed
+    But here's the conclusion I came to
+
+    It's surreal and unfun
+    But I've been so in awe
+    You me and Dave too
+
+    I know it's our friend
+    But I sort of agree
+    Dave's taken this just like a champ
+
+    It's not the most grand
+    That the baby is me
+    But we really oughta be in Dave's camp
+
+    Through these nine months
+    I've been so horrified
+    About the implications metaphysic
+
+    But through these nine months
+    Not one single time
+    Have I told Dave he's terrific
+
+    I know it's not grand
+    But the trio of us
+    Two dads and one paradox daughter
+
+    Can be hand in hand
+    One family of us
+    Come temporal hell or high water
+
+    DAVE: well folks great news
+    JUNE: oh, dave! thank god.
+    KARKAT: DAVE, LOOK AT HER.
+    KARKAT: IT'S A LITTLE JUNE.
+    JUNE: i'm still not entirely sure how it was born with my glasses on...
+    DAVE: i have some bad news
+    KARKAT: WHAT IS IT?
+    JUNE: what do you mean?
+    DAVE: to preserve the time loop this baby has to go back in time and live your childhood june
+    DAVE: we cant keep it
+    KARKAT: ...I GUESS THIS IS OUR ONE CHANCE TO SAY GOODBYE.
+
+    I know it's off brand
+    But I'm teary-eyed
+    I love this little dude most
+
+    Karkat my man
+    And June buddy of mine
+    Now I know why we're so close
+
+    When we were kids
+    Playing SBURB
+    I knew that we all were connected
+
+    Through all this amidst
+    Our trials absurd
+    It's not quite the way we expected
+
+    I know it's off brand
+    But the trio of us
+    Two dads and one paradox daughter
+
+    Can be hand in hand
+    One family of us
+    Come temporal hell or high water
+
+    DAVE: well
+    DAVE: that was weird
+    DAVE: i gotta admit im kinda sad that i didnt get to raise a little june
+    JUNE: i'm not...
+    KARKAT: WELL, AT LEAST WE LEARNED A VALUABLE LESSON FROM THIS.
+    DAVE: we did
+    KARKAT: SURE.
+    JUNE: what was it?
+    KARKAT: I DON'T FUCKING KNOW.
+    KARKAT: BUT I'M SURE SOMEDAY IT WILL COME IN HANDY.
+    KARKAT: LIKE SOME OBSCURE TRIAL WILL HAPPEN IN THE FUTURE AND WE'LL BE ABLE TO DRAW ON OUR COLLECTIVE KNOWLEDGE OF THE MECHANICS OF PARADOX IMPREGNATION.
+    JUNE: it's kind of like jesus, huh?
+    JUNE: a virgin birth.
+    DAVE: definitely not a virgin
+    KARKT: WHAT'S A VIRGIN?
+    JUNE: man, i wonder what would have happened if i'd chosen meat or candy.
+    DAVE: good question june buddy
+    DAVE: i guess the world will just never know
+    [Laughter.]
+    JUNE: probably for the best.
+---
+Track: Dave's Ballad Reprise
+Contributors:
+- Funk McLovin (Dave)
+- articulatelyComposed (Rose)
+Duration: '1:49'
+URLs:
+- https://funkmclovin.bandcamp.com/track/daves-ballad-reprise
+Lyrics: |-
+    DAVE: so yeah basically uh
+    DAVE: i got pregnant with a paradox clone of june
+    DAVE: and that was my weekend
+    DAVE: what about you
+    ROSE: Wait, what.
+    ROSE: Explain.
+    DAVE: alright so
+    DAVE: june was supposed to make a selection between meat and candy at a picnic
+    DAVE: right
+    ROSE: Yes.
+    ROSE: Yeah, that was my idea.
+    DAVE: but she didnt do that
+    DAVE: so like you might have imagined-
+    ROSE: So you gave birth to her.
+    DAVE: yeah yeah
+    DAVE: no thats
+    DAVE: thats basically the whole and the half of it
+    ROSE: ...Why do I feel like this has happened before?
+    DAVE: you know i felt that too
+    DAVE: it was like through the whole thing
+    DAVE: it was like this feeling of deja vu
+    DAVE: i dont even know if i have a womb anymore
+    ROSE: I mean, paradox space can do strange things.
+    DAVE: yeah
+    DAVE: well i guess its good that yknow
+    DAVE: she didnt choose meat or candy
+    DAVE: who knows how that would have gone
+    ROSE: Oh, god.
+    DAVE: yeah who knows
+    ROSE: Now that I think about it, that was a terrible choice.
+    ROSE: I don't know why I even thought it would be... decent.
+    DAVE: yeah thats ok
+    DAVE: you cant see the fu- well
+    DAVE: you cant see the future i guess
+    DAVE: i kinda made a musical angle of it
+    DAVE: so like
+    DAVE: uh
+    DAVE: you wanna
+    DAVE: do you wanna
+    DAVE: you wanna do something with that
+    DAVE: we could probably syndicate this and sell it to someone
+    ROSE: Honestly? Sure, why not.
+    DAVE: alright lets do it
+    ROSE: Why not make a couple bucks aft our wacky adventures.
+    DAVE: yeah
+    DAVE: lets do this
+    DAVE: i had a whole baby i might as well gat a couple dollars out of it
+
+    You (I) had a baby and the baby was June
+    You (I) had a baby and the baby was June
+    You (I) had a baby and the baby was June
+    It's absurd to be true (ooooh)
+
+    Dave (I) had a baby and the baby was June
+    He (I) had a baby and the baby was June
+    Dave (I) had the baby and the baby was June
+    And that fixed the paradox loop (ooooh)
+
+    ROSE: Actually, on second thought, making a musical out of this seems like a bad idea.
+    DAVE: yeah its kind of tacky